A lot of happiness comes from our intimate relationships. Know how to choose wisely when it comes to picking that perfect partner for you. This goes for both men and women. This door does swing both ways, I have seen it and been around it. Picking a partner is like picking a strong foundation for your home. You want something that is solid and will with stand the wind when it blows. That can bend in the wind and bounce back again.
Below you will find 51 tips that I have learned through research and experience with my own life. Study them and see if you have any red flags in your relationship. Love can be blind and don’t ignore those red flags, they are there for a reason; pay close attention to them or you may be paying the price later. There are many fish in the sea for both men and women so remember you deserve the best and never settle for less.
- Learn to love yourself first.
- Don’t get into a relationship to make yourself a whole person, you are already.
- Love is patient.
- Be careful of the takers.
- Make sure they know how to communicate.
- Make sure you like their parents; that is who they are.
- Don’t rush into anything, take it slow.
- Have some common interest.
- Know what you need from someone and they need from you.
10. Stay away from lazy people, they will drive you nuts.
11. Avoid negative people, they will bring you down.
12. Don’t get into a relationship, just to be in one.
13. Be picky there are lots of fish in the sea.
14. Watch for those red flags that tell you this isn’t right.
15. Always expect to be respected for who you are.
16. Don’t let someone try to change who you are.
17. Stay away from married people, they just what a getaway once in a while.
18. Don’t fall for the poor me act.
19. Run from the controller.
20. Avoid the heavy drinkers.
21. Don’t try to fix someone; they are who they want to be.
22. Stay away from the silent type they don’t want to talk.
23. Run from the gold diggers; it is all about money to them.
24. If you like children make sure they do too and don’t let them deceive you on this one.
25. No verbal abuse, it will just escalate.
26. Make sure they know how to fight nice.
27. Know you can love them and they can love you even when you don’t like them.
28. Know they can adjust to your difference and you to theirs.
29. Watch how they treat their parents and siblings.
30. Make sure you complement them in a good way and they you, so you can grown together.
31. If they put you down in front of others, run; it will get worse.
32. If they are a giver, make sure they can take when needed.
33. Make sure they can get their hands dirty. Clean hands means pretty boring.
34. Feel safe with them.
35. If they are always late to events, know you can handle this.
36. If their parents or siblings are abusive they could be too.
37. Sense of humor is important, do they have one.
38. If you have a problem make sure they are there for you.
39. For men: If all they want is a career they will make a terrible mother.
40. For women: If they are only interested in making money, they won’t be there for you.
41. If they are a home body and never do anything, they most likely aren’t going to change.
42. If their place or car is messy, can you handle that? They are probably not going to change.
43. Do they bathe often, hygiene is important?
44. If an only child, did they learn to share?
45. Do they like to be intimate, it not beware, something isn’t right.
46. Is it more important to them what their friends think rather then what you think?
47. Do they get alone with your parents and family?
48. If they are a loner you may what to really give this some thought.
49. Have you caught them in lies?
50. Do you find that you can trust them with your life?
51. Last of all do not get out of one relationship and hurry into another. Learn from the old relationship and why it didn’t work.
Hope this list will help you on your journey to find that right partner. If you have any tips that I have missed I would appreciate hearing about them. Life is just too short to be sharing it with the wrong person and then having to start all over. It is better to get it right the first time. Take it from someone who has walked in those shoes.
Wishing you all a long and wonderful relationship with lots of love in it!
Debbie
P.S. Don’t sell your children short because of your choices when it comes to relationships. They don’t miss a thing!
Nice work! great blog
Thank you
Debbie
I just stumbleupon your blog and i must say what a fantastic website and great posts, I will bookmark your blog.Best Regards! Mark
Thanks Mark I hope you were in need of some tips when it comes to relationships. Have a great week.
Debbie
We are very happy in our marriage with one exception, her mother ‘the interfering witch’. Haha
.-= Ryan´s last blog ..The Greatest Show On Earth =-.
Hi Ryan,
Glad to hear you have a very happy marriage. All I can say when it comes to mother-in-law, I would set boundaries for her and you and the wife stick together when it comes to those boundaries. Sometimes us mother-in-laws have a habit of caring to much. ha ha
Debbie
Now i’m not sure I altogether agree with you on this article. Still I am normally open to new ideas. May well have to feel about it. Useful blog anyway.
Hi Diana,
Well, if you don’t agree what is it that you don’t agree about? Or are you just spamming. Not good Diana.
Debbie
Flexible person can make critical decision. Decision maker is not only do the things right but also do the right things. Many people don’t realize that. This phenomenon can be tired one, but only wise people can give honest opinion in critical time. I have been wondering about this time, between USA and other country, I predict that it will recover as soon as possible. Your give great articles, it can be used for anticipate other problems in the future. And also, we can unite to be great partner. Online writer is part time job, but it was wrong. I’ve been several years raising and collecting money by doing this job. If I can, you can! I hope the slogan and my motto can motivate other people that read my comment, please don’t delete it. I will give you another proof. When I was child, technology is slow down and kicked by other subject. Now, we are depending on technology, right?
Hi Monika,
Ok I am not sure where you are coming from. By your comment it does sound like you do have some frustration. Yes, I do agree with you when you say, “we are depending on technology.” And flexible person can make critical decisions. My question to you is what does this have to do with 51 tips for picking the right partner?
Happiness is how you see your world.
Debbie
It seems that there has been a lot of criteria for choosing the person you love. These are all very good suggestions but I know that a person would not have all this qualities. I believe that when love struck a person, even the most negative thing about him will be neglected.
I know I could not find a perfect partner but one things is for sure the best partner is someone you love and someone who loves you even more.
To be loved is the most wonderful thing in life. When finding that perfect person(which we have to remember that no one is perfect) but at the same time we do need to feel with our heart and think with our mind. If to many negatives start coming out that is a red flag and we better use our minds to see if this is really the person for us. Sometimes a person just wants to be loved, so they will overlook the negative and have regrets later. This is a sign of low self-esteem.
A person can not have all these qualities, but if the bad out weight the good we need to be aware of this.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with my readers, I do appreciate it and blessing to you.
Debbie